The Journey...Ripped from what I called home

Rewinding to the year 2007,not being given a choice i up and left for Cape Town. Numb, i boarded the flight, felt the warm stream flow from my eye...a sign of anger and pain i kept my head high but inside i begun to break, the cracks begun to give in...I FELT LOST, UNWANTED and BROKEN for THEY did not understand, for THEY just let go...i became...THE FORGOTTEN BROKEN DIAMOND.... this is when i knew things were never gonna be the same.

This piece was written on Tuesday 14th August... No longer could i hold it in.

                           BROKEN DIAMOND

Somedays i wake up hoping I would be in a place I know

To pick up the phone and make plans

Plans with people I know,people that understood me.

They promised

They promised never to forget me...

I didn't know.

I wasn't told...

If i had known...i wouldn't have left

I wouldn't have let them RIP me away from the place I loved to hate yet hated to love.

I was stripped of all i Had...

For my identity has gone with all I had.

For my soul has gone back

Back to where I called home.

I am empty...

Lost

Lost in a place where the smiles mask frowns

Where I have to accept the fact that I DO NOT BELONG.

In a place where my true friend is my poetry

Where my tissue is the paper on which I cry.

I cry for I am alone...

I tried to tell you

I tried to scream but to you it was a whisper

I tried to stand but i have no back bone

My spirit like worthless grains of sand

Blown away by the winds of sorrow

For I have no one

For i have my words

I mask my emotions for I must

For i am shunned at my expressions of pain

for i can no longer breath.

I didn't know

I never knew...

I wish i knew...

but they never told me...

why didn't they say anything.

why have i become forsaken by them

the ones I cried to

the ones I spoke to

the ones I trusted.

now i know what they meant

what the others feel

the ones we chose to ignore

the ones we forgot.

but I didn't know.

i didn't ask...

i thought...

i thought i...

I thought I would be able to go back...

i was sure you remembered me...

but you have changed...CLAIMING

that I was the one for you refused

you refused to accept

you refused to see who I really am.

if only I knew...

If only I had asked...

but i didn't have it...

If i knew you would have changed...

i would have come...

i came but you didn't recognize me for i had changed...

if only I knew...

I wish i had known

Now I'm back to where it all began

I am lost

I am alone for you

you promised...

IF ONLY I KNEW...!